praise God that He is good and faithful! i was just going to write down and blog how i am feeling right now. well you see i have this thing for always being a perfectionist. i always have to do things a certain way or else it will mess me up. what im writing now really has nothing to do with what i will mention next, but its somehow related. growing up i wanted to be a doctor...then i found out that going to medical school would cost me not only financially but also emotionally and socially. i would literally have no life if i had gone that path...
now it's like im stuck in a rut...i graduated last year may of 07 and im currently taking two classes to fulfill my requirements for that bachelor in biology...im sort of down because i look back and i would have done things a little different. i guess its all hindsight now. i cant do anything about it...there is one thing that i will never regret and that is when i received the Lord Jesus Christ into my heart and my life.
ever since He became my Lord and Savior it is like He turned my world and my priorities upside down and inside out. He replaced my old lifestyle with a new one, old friends with new friends, and old idols with the promises of tomorrow. now, i ask God where He would guide me at this crucial point in my life. im just searching for answers, but im afraid of growing up. im kind of afraid of what i'll be in the Lord. (not in a bad way but in a good way) He's already revealed bits of pieces of what He will mold me into. im at a crossroad right now.
now i just have to wait. waiting is something im really getting good at. with patience i know that He will show me the way. i just have to receive it when the time comes. i hope that im ready for whatever it is He has in store for me. im praying that ill never fail Him. i pray that God will show me that way. there's something inside of me that doesn't want to just "settle" with my life now. there's just got to be something more that the Lord wants to show me. i don't know what it is.
